I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize