Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize
