Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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