I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
