I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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