i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
