Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
