i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
