he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize