So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
It's just like the Real World with babies
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
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omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
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I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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