I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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