If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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