ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
