This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
