I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
