I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
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I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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