i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
