It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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