remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
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