yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
should my penis look like a turkey
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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