can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
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I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
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Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
How naked do you want me to be?
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