Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
