oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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