He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
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