it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
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