Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
