I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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