i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
