He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
My butt remains clenched, sir.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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