that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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