she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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