Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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