Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
You work out of a Hotel?
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
