I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I know her cup size but not her name....
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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