like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
