home. puking in laundry basket.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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