My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
