dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
he fucked my hip out of place.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
