Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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