someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
