that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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