The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
