he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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