So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I know her cup size but not her name....
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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