The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
