She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
