Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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