Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
