But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
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you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
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Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
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