If i come over, it means nothing
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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